Freaking tired and anxious after the horrible OSCE exam that i had... woke up at 7am after a miserable night of insomnia... dragging myself out of my bed and prepared to get to the hospital for the exam... then being owned by a few stations asking me about Nephrotic Syndrome, interpreting abdominal x-rays, hypothyroidism etc... Received a brief e mail from the co-ordinator that the result will be released between 4:30-5:00pm the next day... (Can't they be more specific ... Grrrr....) Flashing back the previous terrible written paper asking me to talk about the breast screening programme in UK, multiple sclerosis -_-" and endometriosis (this is not even in the revision list) Oh GOD... was really thinking... "that's it... that's it... i'm not going to make it this time... "
The 29 hours before the released of the result was one of the few longest hours ever in my life... why 'few' because there were and there are going to be more moments like this in the near future... why do i have to always make myself into such circumstances where i can't even defaecate or urinate... or sleep properly... Though i was having BBQ with ppl that night... the feeling of anxious never left me... and it's getting worse as the time approaching slowly...
Keep repeating the same questions over and over again to my fellow batch mates "Everyone going to pass right... Sure can one right ?? " Pity them have to answer me the same answer again and again... but i only wanted to hear one answer "YES, We ALL CAN MAKE IT" whenever they are in doubt again... panic attack just struck me hard again... ARGHHhhhhh.... this is a great torture and i have brought myself in...
Getting down earlier to Boldrewood ( the campus that i'm not familiar with) did not help to ease myself down... instead it's making me feeling even worse... sitting down at the couch keep staring back at the notice board and discussing all the possibilities with navin is not calming at all... watching andrea and the other batch mates starting to crowding the compound is making my heart beating faster and faster... i could feel it pounding as if trying to release itself from pericardium... Staff came out keep postponding the release of the result is making me worrier and at some point frustrated with them... Arghhh.... Sitting down quietly, gripping my fist, holding my breath now and then... said a million prayers... not million but billions of prayers... Finally... three staffs walked out the office nodding their head indicating that it's the list we were all waiting for... me and navin were among the first to jumped out of our seat and rushed to the front... stopped by the staff to allow their colleague to actually paste the list up on the board... released us, when the list is finally up and sealed by the glass window... i moved forward... scanning the list up and down, looking for my ID no.
"no... where is it... where is it ????!?!??" Got it... found it !! I PASSED!!! YES I PASSED!!!! as if i just put down the million stones inside me. which had be compressing on my chest all the while.. i felt as if i was as light as feather... who says human need marijuana or similar to feel high... hehe... All fellow IMUnians all passed the exam as well... not great but we only wanted a pass anyway :) Wonderful feeling :) Malaysia here i come!!!
... and here i am back in malaysia... why must i always put myself into such situation.. will earlier and better preparation makes me more confident in such event again in the future ? Do i get the discipline to train myself to focus more on my studies after this event ?? Haih... Life goes on...
Sunday, July 30, 2006
Sunday, June 25, 2006
Help ....
HELP!!!!!!! ARGHHHHHhhhhhh........ STRESSSSSSSS!!!!!!! 2 more weeks to go..... :-( Arghhhhhh.... CONCENTRATE!!!!!!! ARghhhhhhhhHHHHHhhhHhhHHH!!!!
Felt much better now.....
Felt much better now.....
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
~_~"
Sometime i just dun understand my uni... making us travelling from one hospital to another... from one clinic to another... from one health centre to another... not to meet proper different patients but to meet with one particular lecturer to give some particular lectures in different places where they could actually do it in our very own general's seminar rooms... school of medicine have to arrange transport for 5-6 students, a 20 passengers coach to bring student from one end of southampton to another end of southampton (took only 15-20 minutes travelling time) to attend a 2 hours long lectures ( with 20 minutes break in between)... Tell me... which one is cheaper... asking the lecturer to drive to the general to give teaching or sending students over? Making us wake up early in the morning to wait in the cold for a 'always late' (sometime early though) bus... haih...actually i love to travel but not when i'm having an examination soon... Haih haih haih.... stresssssssss.....
As for today, me and my mate went to a small health clinic which is located in a very weird area... (a building built in the middle of industrial factories... imagine how hard is it to find) to meet a consultant ( i think he is a consultant) to talk about "When u should admit a patient to hospital?" for 40 min??!?!?!??! Then off i go all the way back to the hospital where i came from... haih.... Poor consultant have to talk to 2-3 students a week on the same topics over and over and over again... Poor students have to walk and look for a 'so not obvious' place. -_-"
As for today, me and my mate went to a small health clinic which is located in a very weird area... (a building built in the middle of industrial factories... imagine how hard is it to find) to meet a consultant ( i think he is a consultant) to talk about "When u should admit a patient to hospital?" for 40 min??!?!?!??! Then off i go all the way back to the hospital where i came from... haih.... Poor consultant have to talk to 2-3 students a week on the same topics over and over and over again... Poor students have to walk and look for a 'so not obvious' place. -_-"
Thursday, May 25, 2006
Something medical ppl might be interested...
Medical People... read about this....
"LONDON: Malaysian specialist doctors will berewarded with an “instant” pay rise of about RM4,000 if they were to return home and serve the country.Health Minister Datuk Dr Chua Soi Lek said theywould immediately move up from the Grade U41salary scale of RM3,000 to Grade U48 of RM7,000.He said the Public Services Department (PSD) hadapproved the “big jump” in recognition of theirspecialised skills and training in Britain.“So my advice is return home while the going’s stillgood,” he said during a dialogue with a group ofMalaysian doctors and medical students in MalaysiaHall here on Saturday.Dr Chua urged them not to take too long as therecould be a surplus of doctors in Malaysia in 10 to 15years.“It’s either doctor laku or doctor yang tak laku,” hesaid, adding that the competition was intense in theKlang Valley, which had a ratio of about one doctor to400 people.Dr Chua also cautioned Malaysian medical studentsthat they would find it more difficult to work in Britainin the next three to five years.This is because the British government wouldincreasingly give preference to its citizens and EUnationals, while Malaysians would be lumped togetherwith other nationalities.He said he was not appealing to them on the groundsof nationalism or patriotism.“We’re appealing to them on the basis that there isdefinitely a better future in their own country.”Elaborating on the incentive for Malaysian specialists,he said those with post-basic qualifications such asMembership of the Royal College of Physicians,United Kingdom (MRCP) and MRCOG (Obstetrics andGynaecology), as well as two years' experience wouldstart off on the U48 salary scale.“That’s a big jump and they’re only two rungs awayfrom Special Scale already,” he said.Dr Chua said the ministry was also developing 32 sub-speciality services that faced shortages.He said they had taken over from the PSD the task ofselecting medical students for masters andpostgraduate programmes.“We plan to send 400 students for sub-specialitytraining, both in Malaysia and overseas every year.”He said the ministry hoped to overcome mismatchesas had happened in the past, where the students’aspirations were not matched by their scholarships.Dr Chua also touched on a wide range of incentivesas well as career advancement prospects including:ON-CALL allowance in- creased from RM25 toRM170;ALLOWING locum in government hospitals;SIMPLIFIED Bahasa Malaysia exam for serviceconfirmation;FULL-PAYING patients in Putrajaya andSelayang hospitals as a pilot project, where part of thefull rates go to doctors; and298 promotional posts approved for seniorpositions.Present were Malaysian High Commissioner DatukAbdul Aziz Mohamed, Malaysian Students Departmentdirector Dr Syed Raisudin Syed Abdullah, IslamicMedical Association of Malaysia (UK & Eire) vice-president Dr Mohammad Iqbal, UK Executive Councilfor Malaysian Students chairman Wan Mohd FirdausWan Mohd Fuaad and MCA Club UK president AlanLing. "
What are you guys' opinions on this? To me... this doesn't really concern medical student like me... cause at the first place... will i get the chance to be a specialist in UK first or not due to the new NHS rules? ;-( Are all the petitions thing going to work?? hmmmmm.... Who cares, graduate first is more important.... Intermediate coming.... *sob sob*
"LONDON: Malaysian specialist doctors will berewarded with an “instant” pay rise of about RM4,000 if they were to return home and serve the country.Health Minister Datuk Dr Chua Soi Lek said theywould immediately move up from the Grade U41salary scale of RM3,000 to Grade U48 of RM7,000.He said the Public Services Department (PSD) hadapproved the “big jump” in recognition of theirspecialised skills and training in Britain.“So my advice is return home while the going’s stillgood,” he said during a dialogue with a group ofMalaysian doctors and medical students in MalaysiaHall here on Saturday.Dr Chua urged them not to take too long as therecould be a surplus of doctors in Malaysia in 10 to 15years.“It’s either doctor laku or doctor yang tak laku,” hesaid, adding that the competition was intense in theKlang Valley, which had a ratio of about one doctor to400 people.Dr Chua also cautioned Malaysian medical studentsthat they would find it more difficult to work in Britainin the next three to five years.This is because the British government wouldincreasingly give preference to its citizens and EUnationals, while Malaysians would be lumped togetherwith other nationalities.He said he was not appealing to them on the groundsof nationalism or patriotism.“We’re appealing to them on the basis that there isdefinitely a better future in their own country.”Elaborating on the incentive for Malaysian specialists,he said those with post-basic qualifications such asMembership of the Royal College of Physicians,United Kingdom (MRCP) and MRCOG (Obstetrics andGynaecology), as well as two years' experience wouldstart off on the U48 salary scale.“That’s a big jump and they’re only two rungs awayfrom Special Scale already,” he said.Dr Chua said the ministry was also developing 32 sub-speciality services that faced shortages.He said they had taken over from the PSD the task ofselecting medical students for masters andpostgraduate programmes.“We plan to send 400 students for sub-specialitytraining, both in Malaysia and overseas every year.”He said the ministry hoped to overcome mismatchesas had happened in the past, where the students’aspirations were not matched by their scholarships.Dr Chua also touched on a wide range of incentivesas well as career advancement prospects including:ON-CALL allowance in- creased from RM25 toRM170;ALLOWING locum in government hospitals;SIMPLIFIED Bahasa Malaysia exam for serviceconfirmation;FULL-PAYING patients in Putrajaya andSelayang hospitals as a pilot project, where part of thefull rates go to doctors; and298 promotional posts approved for seniorpositions.Present were Malaysian High Commissioner DatukAbdul Aziz Mohamed, Malaysian Students Departmentdirector Dr Syed Raisudin Syed Abdullah, IslamicMedical Association of Malaysia (UK & Eire) vice-president Dr Mohammad Iqbal, UK Executive Councilfor Malaysian Students chairman Wan Mohd FirdausWan Mohd Fuaad and MCA Club UK president AlanLing. "
What are you guys' opinions on this? To me... this doesn't really concern medical student like me... cause at the first place... will i get the chance to be a specialist in UK first or not due to the new NHS rules? ;-( Are all the petitions thing going to work?? hmmmmm.... Who cares, graduate first is more important.... Intermediate coming.... *sob sob*
Sunday, April 16, 2006
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
